The Lies We Tell Ourselves

I’m allergic to chocolate.

I’ve ridden in a hot air balloon.

And I’ve cooked with Paula Deen on TV.

Can you guess what’s true and what’s a lie? Don’t worry if you can’t guess. You don’t know me that well yet!

There’s an incredibly easy ice-breaker game I’ve been playing since high school. It’s called Two Truths and a Lie, and the object of the game is to try and guess which statements are true and which statement is the lie. It’s not always so easy to figure out what’s true and what isn’t, is it?

Even in real life, sometimes I don’t know what to believe!

As a business owner, mom, and wife, I often feel like I’m playing a perpetual game of Two Truths and a Lie. The conflicting messages coming at me from all directions make being able to discern the truth extra difficult. The blurry line between truth and lies mess with my mind. It’s paralyzing.

The Lies

You don’t have enough time.

You don’t know what you’re doing.

People only care about what you’re doing right now.

You need to have all the answers.

And nobody will like the real you.

Because you are weak.

None of these statements are true!

Want to know the truth?

The Truth

You do have time, and you get to control how you spend it.

You do know what to do. You have a toolbox of solutions at your fingertips. You have been preparing your whole life for this.

You are not defined by what you are doing right now. Owning who you are and knowing what you want is a lifelong process. Enjoy the process.

You do not have to have all the answers. “I don’t know” is also an acceptable answer. Whether you take your time or plunge in head first, learning as you go is a valiant form of learning.

Want the world to like you? The real you is the you the world needs. Vulnerability is magnetic. And while you can’t make everyone be your best friend, being true to yourself is a reward unto itself.

You are not weak just because you have weaknesses. You are capable of managing your weaknesses. You are not defined by them.

What’s Next

The first step in knowing what to do is being able to recognize the lies. Lies, like mushrooms and mold, grow in the dark.

Think about the darkness that lives inside you.

Is there anything that drains you?
Makes you feel weak?
That you’re ashamed of?

The answers to those questions are the beginning of lies.

Now, think about the things that

Energize you?
Give you life?
And make you feel strong?


When we play Two Truths and a Lie, we get to know our friends. To be really good at the game, though, you have to understand how people think and watch for signals that they’re telling the truth—or lying through their teeth. Watch for changes in tone, rate of speech, voice changes, and nervous body language, all of which could be signs that the statement someone is giving is a lie.  But sometimes—and this is the scary thing—the lies people tell are more believable than the true things!

How about you? How can you tell when you’re lying to yourself? Do you feel nervous, weak, or ashamed? Do you feel like an imposter in your life?

Tell the truth about who you are. Figure out what’s true about you, and then evaluate everything else against that metric. In the core of my being, I want to be curious, brave, and genuine. Whenever I stray from those three things, I know I’m in danger of falling prey to a lie.

And by the way, I’m not allergic to chocolate. Good grief! Good chocolate is sometimes the only thing that keeps me going!

Ready to take it to the next level?