How is NOT the Right Question to Ask

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Let me rephrase that.
How is not the right FIRST question to ask.

Hey there, friend.

Do you ever feel like you’re stuck in a rut?

You’ve got a big idea, but you’re not sure…
(I’m cringing now because I don’t want to say this next part)
…HOW to get started.

I know.

Yikes.

The big HOW.
It’s a loaded question. And for someone like me, someone who likes to have all the answers so she never looks stupid in front of a crowd, it really is the question of all questions.

How stops me in my tracks.
Every.
Single.
Time.

The world is changing—FAST—and I’m starting to feel like I don’t understand anything. How is trying to become a regular part of my own vocabulary.

Don’t worry—I won’t let it!

The weird thing is that I’ve always hated this question—not because I might not have the right answer, but because I think we miss out on something very important when this becomes the FIRST question we ask.

Let me explain.

There’s a Peter Block quote that I’ve been thinking about lately:

“There is depth in the question, ‘How do I do this?’ that is worth exploring. The question is a defense against the action. It is a leap past the question of purpose, past the question of intentions, and past the drama of responsibility. The question ‘How?’ more than any other question looks for the answer outside of us. It is an indirect expression of our doubt.”

— Peter Block

Purpose, Intentions, and Responsibility

Let’s dive right in.

Block says the question of “how” is a DEFENSE against action.

Ouch.

It is a leap past the question of purpose, past the question of intentions, and past the drama of responsibility.

Triple Ouch.

I gotta be honest. I read a lot of online news, follow a lot of blogs, and listen to a lot of podcasts about culture and invention and progress, and while loading up on all that inspiring content can be really encouraging, I can easily get lost as a spectator to other people’s accomplishments.

Yep, I hear it when I write it. 🤦‍♀️

Maybe I should be working on something of my own.

Purpose, Intention, and Responsibility aren’t questions at all. They are reflections of what we value and determine how we move in the world.

The real, almost visceral question of how can be such a downer when you aspire to live in a world of purpose and accomplishment.

It reeks of FEAR.

Of course, whenever I’m thinking about something big that I don’t understand I go to THE BOOK to see what God said about it, and I found a few examples I’d like to share here: In every case study, the main character went to God with the question that’s been on the forefront of my own mind lately: HOW???

In Genesis 18, God tells Abraham that he will be the father of a great nation, which was clearly hilarious to both Abraham and Sarah. No one their age got pregnant and had children. At the time, our modern concept of what a “nation” is didn’t even exist. People lived in tribal communities. So HOW was God going to create a nation from the loins of Abraham?

Genesis 18:11: Abraham and Sarah were both very old by this time, and Sarah was long past the age of having children. so she laughed silently to herself and said, “How could a worn-out woman like me enjoy such pleasure, especially when my master, my husband, is also so old?”

Pretty bold when you think about it. Would you laugh at an audible promise from God?

Now consider this exchange between Moses and God outlined in Exodus 3:10:

Now I am sending you to the king of Egypt so that you can lead my people out of his country. but Moses said to God, “I am nobody. How can I go to the king and bring the Israelites of Egypt?

At the time, the Bible records about 600,000 men who ended up leaving with Moses. Including women and children the number could have been closer to 2 million, nearly half of Egypt’s total population.

No wonder Moses had some reservations about leading God’s people out of Egypt! How do you coordinate travel plans without the ease of communicating via the Internet? 🤷‍♀️

It wasn’t easy being an Israelite.

Years later, God instructs Gideon to save Israel from the hands of the Mideonites. This guy was woefully unprepared. If he was applying for a job today, the interviewer would have said, “You lack experience.” Code for “we need someone older.” But more politically correct.

Judges 6:15: “Please, my Lord,” Gideon replied, “How can I save Israel? Indeed, my clan is the weakest in Manassah, and I am the youngest in my father’s house.”

Even though God had come through for Israel again and again, they often needed reminding. Jeremiah ultimately became one of the greatest prophets in Israel. He is best known for his prophecies of gloom and doom. Soon, he would warn Israel that if they didn’t get their act together, they were destined for destruction.

But not yet.

This, apparently, was not a message that Jeremiah wanted to deliver. A message like this wasn’t going to help him win any popularity contests.

According to Jeremiah 1:6, he said, “Alas, Sovereign Lord…I do not know how to speak; I am too young.”

Ok, let’s fast-forward a bit for a sneak peek into the life of David before he became the greatest King Israel had ever known. We see David happen upon a face-off between the people of Israel and the giant Goliath, who is mercilessly taunting them. The Israelites, cowering in his wake, ask, “How?” What we see here, however, is that David (the one who ends up overcoming the giant) actually doesn’t pose this question at all. (Hmmm…we’ll come back to this later.)

One of the first encounters with God we see in the New Testament occurs when Zechariah is in the temple of the Lord. According to Luke 1, an angel of the Lord appears before Zechariah and tells him that his barren wife, Elizabeth, will bear him a son. In a deja vu moment that harkens back to the days of Sarah and Abraham, Zechariah asks,

“How can I be sure of this? I am an old man and my wife is well along in years.”

In the very same chapter, God sends the angel Gabriel to Mary to tell her about the baby she will carry, the one that will change the world forever. Mary is young and healthy, but there’s a twist.

Luke 1:34: Mary asked the angel, “How can this be? I’m a virgin.”

And yet it does come to be.

All grown up, wherever Jesus goes, crowds follow. On one account, more than five thousand people gather in the hot sun to hear Jesus teach. Lunchtime approaches, the people are getting hungry—very hungry—but the disciples aren’t operating a restaurant. How will they feed so many?

John 6:8: Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, spoke up. “Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?”

In every single case, God responds with some version of these words: “Listen, kid, don’t worry. I will be with you. Is there anything too hard for ME?”

And that’s where I think we get hung up.

We think that doing incredible work depends on us.

And okay, yeah, I believe in hard work, too. I also believe that we worship THE GOD OF HOW. We don’t always have to have all the answers. Maybe purpose, intention, and responsibility are enough to carry us.

You may be thinking, “But God hasn’t audibly spoken to me. God hasn’t sent an angel to me. I haven’t walked alongside the living, breathing Jesus.”

Maybe not.

But you have something equally as rich and powerful.

Hebrews 4: 12 says, “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”

What is interesting to me in all the examples in both the Old and New Testament is that God performed his miracles by meeting his people exactly where they were and invited them to use only what they already possessed. No one had to go and get a special degree or make sweeping changes in order for the plan to be completed. They simply had to trust God’s purpose, act with intention, and keep straight who was responsible for what.

So…

If “How” isn’t the first question we should ask, what IS the first question?

Here’s the one I keep coming back to:

““Will you go with me, God?””

There’s a promise that shows up again and again, of God saying, “I will never leave you nor forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6, 31:8, Joshua 1:5, Psalms 27:9, 1 Chronicles 28:20 among others ) and then of Jesus saying “And I will ask the Father and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever” (John 14:16).

I told you that I would come back to the David and Goliath story.

Isn’t it interesting that all the people around David asked that question, and yet David never did? Poor David. Young David. Weak David. He possessed no special skills or equipment. In fact, 1 Samuel tells us that “David left his things with the keeper of supplies, ran to the battle lines, and asked his brothers how they were” (1 Samuel 17:22). When Saul realized that David was bold enough to actually fight the Philistine, he gave him a coat of armor, a bronze helmet, and a sword.

But David took them off.

That’s right. He shed the fancy fighting equipment, and instead gathered his shepherd staff, along with a few rocks and a sling, and then approached the Philistine.

And then he said what I wish I was brave enough to say:

“For the battle is the Lord’s (v. 47)

We all face giants, seemingly insurmountable obstacles that threaten to squash us or humiliate us. We think we have to have all the answers. We ask HOW like the battle is ours to win.

But like David, who said that all glory and honor would go to God, we too need to remember that this life isn’t about us. If I want to bring glory and honor to God through purposeful living, I don’t need to ask HOW, I just need to be willing to ask God to come with me.

Want more good stuff?

***Fun Fact: When I was a camper at Camp WinShape for Girls in the 80s and 90s, we engaged in a Native American storytelling tradition around the campfire that invited listeners to say the word “wow” when something sad or disappointing was shared and “how” during moments of great triumph. I always thought the counselors had got it mixed up, but nope—HOW was what you said when you agreed with the storyteller! It was not a question of doubt, but rather a proclamation of awe.

Life Hack #1: Editing is Never a Waste of Time

I don’t like to waste time.

There.

I said it.

I don’t like to waste time.

But I’m guilty. I waste time ALL THE TIME.

That’s why when I was trapped on an airplane for nine hours this summer on my way home from Barcelona, I decided to be a productive grown-up. The in-flight entertainment system included the opportunity to dig into courses taught by world-class instructors through MasterClass.com. I don’t have a membership, but I’m a sucker for an invitation to learn something new for free. This was my chance.

With a day-long flight ahead of me and no desire to close my eyes because—AWKWARD—I scrolled through the available options and chose Malcolm Gladwell’s master class on Non-fiction Writing. Twenty-four lessons. Six hours. Master instruction from a critically-acclaimed author.

As it turns out, watching six straight hours of content wasn’t that hard. What was hard was taking notes because the rest of the passengers had shuttered the windows, the flight attendants had turned off the lights, and most everyone, including my seatmate, were trying to sleep. My hand-written notes are a little sloppy, to say the least!

Malcolm Gladwell’s Masterclass on Writing

Here’s what I learned:

Writing and life aren’t all that different. In fact, you may have even heard that writing is thinking. That’s not a new idea.

"I don't know what I think until I try to write it down."—Joan Didion

'Writing is thinking. To write well is to think clearly. That's why it's so hard.—David McCullough

"Writing is thinking on paper. Anyone who thinks clearly can write clearly, about anything at all."—William Zinsser

And a lot of writers don’t believe in Writer’s Block, either, which is simply being unable to think about what to write next or how to proceed with the story. Malcolm’s advice? Just keep writing. “A lot of problems,” he says, “are resolved in the doing.”

And he continues, “You can always re-write. Make use of that extraordinary freedom.”

Extraordinary Freedom

EXTRAORDINARY FREEDOM was the phrase that jumped out at me. There is freedom in being able to re-write, to edit. We get to write and rewrite the story of our lives over and over again.

And I love that. It reminds me of this scene about editing from an old episode of Everybody Loves Raymond. In it, Raymond gives a toast at his brother, Robert’s wedding, a wedding in which everything goes comically awry. He explains editing better than anyone I’ve ever heard. You can watch the entire speech here:

Raymond gives a toast at his brother, Robert’s wedding. The theme: Editing. “Keep the good ones.”

I like the idea of applying the editing principle to my own life. Ask anyone who’s ever eaten anything from my kitchen. I mess things up all them time. You know how expensive food is these days! We can’t throw anything out. Sometimes the very best dishes are born from what started out as a veritable disaster. So I just keep stirring. Add a little of this. A little of that. Suddenly, something new and even better emerges. (Well, most of the time)

As I write this, four months have passed since the coffee shop closed. One of my favorite parts of owning the shop was sharing my own recipes. We launched a new menu last January, with our signature item being a homemade biscuit waffle—essentially scratch-made biscuit dough that we cooked on a waffle iron. The dough was tedious to make and involved grating pounds and pounds of frozen butter everyday. It was both labor intensive and messy. I found myself staying late to do it on more than one occasion. I remember racking my brain trying to figure out an easier way to make a homemade biscuit waffle that wouldn’t sacrifice flavor for convenience.

EDITING IS ABOUT SIMPLIFICATION

Then one day, at home, I was making my own biscuits using a recipe passed down from my grandmother to my mother to me. It was easy, shelf stable, and could be mixed up easily by anyone—no special skills required. The catch was that it included one very unconventional ingredient—an ingredient I didn’t share until I first had several people taste the waffles made with the new recipe. An ingredient that would be added along with the milk just before the dough hit the waffle iron. The new recipe was a hit! Slightly sweeter and fluffier than the original version, we immediately adopted it.

You see, there’s EXTRAORDINARY FREEDOM to re-write what isn’t working.

I used to put a lot of pressure on myself to get things right the first time. But why? That’s not how the world really works. New ideas are tested and evaluated, revised and simplified. The first draft is never the best draft. It’s complicated and messy. And that’s a good thing!

That waffle mix went from seven ingredients to four, and prep time went from about 10 minutes per batch to just two. Not only that, the new waffle also cost less to make. In the restaurant biz, that’s a big deal.

That’s the power of EDITING.

I want to believe that the principle at work in making book drafts and waffle recipes more palatable can surely be applied to other crises of concern.

Even the big questions, like “What should I do with my life?” or “How do I know I’m on the right track?” can be answered by applying the extraordinary freedom available to anyone who has the courage to EDIT along the way.

The story that’s being written can always be re-written. Do you agree?

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What problem are you working on today? Take hold of your own extraordinary freedom. Then let me know how things are going or how I can help. I’d love to cheer you on!

Want more good stuff?

P.S. Hey, friend, I know you’re wondering about that secret ingredient. I’ll tell you—it was MAYONNAISE! Before you say, “Ew…gross…just remember mayo is basically just oil and eggs and when you add that plus milk to self rising flour and a little sugar, you get something pretty delicious!

What Does It Mean if Your Lucky Bamboo Dies?

Help! The lucky bamboo is dead!

My dad has been growing bamboo in our backyard for as long as I can remember. It’s the kind of plant—ahem—grass —that most other people shun. They cut it down and complain to the homeowner’s association of its encroaching roots. Vile weed! Luckily for my dad, he lives in a neighborhood that doesn’t have an association.

Properties of bamboo:

• Bamboo is the fastest growing land-plant in the world. The only thing that grows quicker is giant sea kelp.

• Clumping bamboo purifies the air up to 30% more effectively than any other plant. Walking through a bamboo forest, high on all that extra oxygen, can help relieve tension and headaches and make you feel happier.

• Thomas Edison used a carbonized bamboo filament in his very first successful light bulb.

• Bamboo is not flammable, but does make a loud popping sound in a fire due to the air pockets that exist between nodes. The very first fire crackers made in China were created out of bamboo.

• Snakes don't like bamboo. Snakes like to curl up in warm, silent places. Bamboo mulch is both too loud and too cold (due to the air purification). Furthermore, the stems are too slippery to climb.

With all these good-for-you properties, why would anyone NOT want a few stalks of lucky bamboo?

Turns out lucky bamboo isn’t bamboo at all. All those properties I just told you about? Forget about them. They don’t apply to lucky bamboo. I feel like I’ve been duped. Lucky bamboo is actually part of the plant species called dracaena sanderiana, native to Africa, not China. It’s popular because of its ability to grow in low light. Textbooks also describe dracaena as “tenacious” and “difficult to destroy.” And there you have it— the magic properties that somehow linked real bamboo with the lucky kind.

The other day, we were cleaning out the coffee shop, getting the last of everything out so it would be ready for our final walk-through with the landlord. On the counter where the coffee grinders and espresso machines used to sit was a bottle that houses our single stalk of lucky bamboo. I noticed two weeks ago that the top was beginning to turn yellow, and then yesterday, as we cleared out the last remnants of what was left of Copper Coin, I discovered the bamboo was brown all the way down.

It died.

And I’m not superstitious, but I am a little bit stitious.

Isn’t it weird that our one tangible symbol of wealth and prosperity died just as our real-life dream keeled over too?

This single stalk lucky bamboo, which had been thriving on our barista counter for more than a year (some employees testified it had been there for several years), is now totally defunct. No one knows how we came by our lucky bamboo. Maybe another local business gave it to us? After all, lucky bamboo is a popular corporate gift because it brings with it the promise to keep the business flourishing. It is a symbol of power, strength, truth, commitment, and prosperity.

These days, I notice people looking at me with pity in their eyes. I can tell they want to ask me about the coffee shop, but don’t. I know what they’re thinking, though. “Poor thing. She just couldn’t hack it in the business world.” It’s truly as if someone has died. I think they’re afraid that if they bring up “the closing” I’ll start crying, but they’re dying to know. “What really happened?” they whisper to their friends. I think they’re hoping to avoid whatever horrible plague befell us. They want to make sure it’s not contagious.

Trust me—you can ask me about the coffee shop.

Gavin and I ended it on our terms. It was our choice. I promise I won’t cry. We tried something that we thought would be both profitable and fun, and as it turns out—it wasn’t that profitable, and it wasn’t that fun.

But I’m still glad we did it.

Right now, we’re watching a series on Netflix called The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, a show about a woman named Kimmy who spent fifteen years in a bunker as the kidnapped hostage of a crazed cult leader. She’s now living her best life with her gay roommate, Titus, in a sketchy area of New York City.

This conversation between Kimmy and Titus in Season 4 really got to me:

“TITUS: Hey, do you ever wonder how your life might’ve been different if you’d never gotten in that van? I mean, just one little moment, —if you—

KIMMY: No. There’s no point. I’ve been through a lot of terrible stuff that I wish had never happened. But I still have to believe that this is where I’m meant to be, because if i didn’t... ...I’d go crazy.

”

— The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt

I have to believe that this is where I’m meant to be, too. In fact, it is exactly where I’m meant to be.

One stalk of lucky bamboo signifies simplicity and a meaningful life. That’s what Copper Coin showed me. My year-long coffeehouse experience showed me that what I really want, deep down, is simplicity and a meaningful life.

I read recently that people tend to define success primarily through the meaning and purpose they derive from their lives. Purpose is forward-thinking and is closely linked to goal-setting, whereas meaning is how you view your past. The dead bamboo represents my past, a past I view with enormous gratitude.

On the last day at Copper Coin, at 3:00 PM, just as we locked the doors for the very last time, the song Closing Time by Semisonic played over our speaker system. This line rings true even now: “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.”

And so it goes.

And so here we are…a new beginning.

P.S. I didn’t bring the lucky bamboo home. That’s some bad ju-ju right there. :)

Want more good stuff?

What if Success is About What You Have to Leave Behind?

The Words We Use

If you’ve ever studied another language, you know that words that are familiar to us in our own language, often mean something different in the language we’re learning.

In Spanish, for example, the word PIE does not mean delicious Thanksgiving dessert. It means FOOT.

SOPA, though it sounds like our word for SOAP, actually means SOUP.

And EMBARAZADO, contrary to popular opinion, doesn’t mean EMBARRASSED, but PREGNANT.

You can see how you could easily get into trouble misrepresenting any of these words in normal conversation. Things could get awkward fast.

Like, “ Mmmm…No puedo esperar poner un tenedor in ese PIE hermoso.”
Translation: “Mmmm…I can’t wait to put a fork in that beautiful FOOT.”

Or

“Esta SOPA es tan deliciosa. Voy a comerla todos los dias.”
Translation: “This SOAP is so delicious: I’m going to eat it everyday.”

Or

Ella esta EMBARAZADA porque se cayo de la cama anoche.
Translation: She is PREGNANT because she fell off the bed last night.

Is that how that works? I had no idea!

But there are some words, that even though they don’t mean what you think they SHOULD mean, nevertheless, have interesting hidden meanings.

In Spanish, the word for SUCCESS is EXITO. Sounds a lot like our English word for EXIT, doesn’t it? And I don’t think that’s a coincidence. There’s something beautiful about walking out from some dark space and through that wide door with the glowing EXIT sign suspended over it and into the wide, bright world of something better.

SUCCESS

Success means something different to different people. There is no one definition. Asking “What does success mean to you?” is like asking someone what “family” means or even something as mundane as “vacation.” Our definitions are different because our values are different.

I love the imagery of thinking about success in terms of what you want to leave behind. Closing that metaphorical door can be a thought-provoking, visual example of what it means to move forward after loss, oppression, or a simple change in circumstances.

What we carry with us might be heavy. There’s a strong chance that burden won’t fit through the door anyway. We need to shed it before we can move toward our ultimate calling.

Don’t cross the threshold until you’ve dropped the mantle of self-doubt, comparison, and envy. No matter your definition of success, these three things can have no part in it. I know I’m preaching to the choir—I’m actually preaching to myself—because self-doubt, comparison, and envy follow me everywhere I go.

Today’s the day that I tell them I’m leaving them behind for good!

You probably have conflicting emotions over what you’re leaving behind, too. Welcome those feelings for what they are: a visceral response or reaction to a moment in time. Time moves. And so do you. You won’t always feel the way you do right now.

Leave behind the scarcity mindset that threatens to jeopardize what you want most. As Aaron Burr so famously said at the end of Hamilton the musical, “the world was wide enough for both Hamilton and me.”

And you.

Yes, the world is big enough for all of us, and your success does not threaten mine—and vice versa.

The last thing to leave behind is ungratefulness. I say this only because even painful experiences have value. To discount those experiences is an insult to everyone who has ever overcome a difficult situation and used it to do something great. In fact, many (dare I say most?) of the people we venerate as successful have overcome unimaginable hardship to achieve their goals.

What’s Next

If you’ve been following this blog for the last year, then you know that in October 2021, my husband and I purchased a coffee shop in town. This summer, we made the difficult decision to close it. Our last day was September 3rd. We live in a society that often elevates the entrepreneur who keeps going despite evidence to the contrary. For us, the decision was difficult and fraught with emotion, made easier only because we knew we would be able to sell both the business and the assets. That dream died three hours before our scheduled closing last week. I have so many questions, not the least of which is “Why?” and “What is the purpose of this?” We closed the business because it demanded something from our family we weren’t willing to give. And whether or not anyone else understands that doesn’t really matter. We have peace about what we left behind. I can’t say I haven’t struggled over the last month with the meaning of both success and failure. Ultimately, however, I came to the conclusion that when I get to the end of my life and plot the important points along the timeline of my journey, this experience will be just that—a dot on the page—something we tried and did and learned from and ultimately left behind.

For what?

That remains to be seen. To say I’m a bit emotional is an understatement.

Fun Fact: The Spanish word for emotional is not EMOCIONADA. That word actually means EXCITED.

And it IS exciting to start something new. Yo estoy emocionada! (I am excited!)

Do you agree? If so, let’s take a journey toward “better” together.

But What Does God Want Me to Do?

What are we going to DO???

That used to be the question my kids asked me when they were bored. And I’d always respond: “Only boring people get bored.”

But now that I’m experiencing a new reality, one in which I can’t spend time with my friends, hang out in coffee shops, eat in restaurants, or do a group fitness class at my gym, I have to admit: I get it.

There’s only so many “art projects” and “cooking classes” a person can do with their kids before that question becomes the one I’m asking myself.

I keep reading all these articles about things we can do to combat our boredom. But one thing I don’t hear anyone talking about is this:

What does God want us to do?

The temptation is to ask for clarity. We do it when we have to make a choice amongst a variety of good options, we do it when we’re faced with situations that are novel or new, and we also do it when we’re in the midst of a crisis.

Today, my prayer might go, “Lord, please give me clarity about how best to parent my kids today.”

I read somewhere that clarity is the crutch of the Christian. We pray, beg, and plead for clarity, and if we don’t get it, we think that means God didn’t answer our prayer.

But Mother Teresa said, “I have never had clarity; what I have always had is trust. So I will pray that you will trust God.”

What TRUST looks like in real life:

1. God wants you to be Observant:

   Look around!

   When you pay attention to what God is doing in the world around you, you become more aware of what he is doing in you. And maybe that’s the point: not that the world will change, but that you will.

2. God wants you to be Expectant:

   Wait for it!

   When you live with hopeful expectation, you realize that even when God is silent, he is not absent. Right now, perhaps your future looks hopeless or scary. Rest assured that God loves you, and is always inviting you to interact with the larger story that is happening in the world.

3. God wants you to be Available:

   Raise your hand!

   When you shift your perspective from a “need to know” mentality you realize that the “get to experience” life is the more adventurous way to to understand God. Remember when Moses encountered the burning bush?

   “When the Lord saw that he had gover to look, God called to him from within the bush, ‘Moses! Moses!’ And Moses said, ‘Here I am.’” Exodus 3:4

   And Moses received the assignment of a lifetime.

4. God wants you to be Objective:

   Share your experience!

   Your experience will be reflective of your thoughts, not your circumstances. Circumstances are always neutral; you get to decide the story you want to tell.

5. God wants you to be Obedient:

   Do the thing!

   When you figure out who you are, you will know what you’re supposed to do. You are a child of God, and as his child, you have been gifted with extraordinary confidence. That means you get to be a “wow” person, not a “how” person. Instead of asking “How can I do this?” you get to proclaim to the world: “Wow! I can do this!” The difference is faith in action.

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Over the last couple of months, I have been doing a Bible study called Experiencing God with some friends in my neighborhood. The content feels relevant to me now, more than ever. If you have a specific problem you’re trying to work through or you simply want to understand more about God so that you can hear him more clearly in your own life, I heartily recommend this study:

“If you’re sensitive to what God is doing around you, He will clearly speak to you through His activity. You’ll know that God is at work, because what you see will astound you, and human power and wisdom will not explain it. When you experience events that surpass your understanding and ability, it may be that God is communicating a critical message to you.”

— Henry & Richard Blackaby, Experiencing God

Living through a global pandemic means I won’t be breaking out of this self-imposed quarantine anytime soon. When it’s over, I don’t want to have any regret over how I used this unprecedented gift of time. No regrets, no waste.

And I’m not asking for clarity; I’m counting on trust.

Want more good stuff?

I’d love to know what you’re learning. Leave a comment or simply hit “reply” if you’re getting this email in your inbox. I read every single note, and your encouragement and stories mean the world to me. Thank you for reading!

WINSday on Wednesday--Your Vantage Point is the Point of Your Advantage

Have you ever felt like you were suffocating under a mountain of disappointments, only to discover that the shattered pieces of your life weren't rubble after all, but actually the building blocks of what would ultimately become the capstone of your life's work?

We all have a friend who seems to have it all. Her kids have straight A’s. Her house is immaculate. She never gets sick, and she’s always on vacation.

And we all also have a friend who always seems to get the short end of the stick. Her house needs repairs. Her doctor gives her a bad report. Her teenager gets in an accident. Her love story is crumbling.

It doesn’t seem fair.

From the inside looking out, it seems like there’s no way out.

But from the outside looking in, you see the place where light can enter. And maybe it’s because you, too, know a little bit about hardship. You have shouldered the pain, experienced the diagnosis, and weathered the storm. You’ve lost the marriage, the job, and the house. You know some dreams may never come true. Your heart breaks for your friend.

And because your heart beats on, you know hers will, too. Believe it or not, from where you sit now, you do have an advantage.

And the vantage IS your advantage.

The position lends credibility to the view.

My friend, Courtney, knows a little bit about vantage points.

A few years ago, two of Courtney’s close family members were victims of abuse. A person they knew betrayed their trust. For a moment Courtney felt blindsided. She never could have imagined that something like this could have happened to her or anyone in her family. She didn’t know how she would survive it.

But that was only for a moment.

Courtney sprung into action, finding help and seeking justice for the perpetrator.

Like so many women who have experienced hard seasons, even trauma, she found her purpose both in spite of it and because of it.

Now she’s the founder of Pinwheels for Protection, an advocacy outreach for victims of abuse. Over the past three years, she’s raised $60,000 to fund therapies for victims in Salisbury, MD. Courtney has dedicated her life to an awareness campaign that not only helps prevent abuse, but also helps family members identify the signs of abuse, and support victims as they heal in the months and years to come.

The Life Crisis Center has provided Courtney with an avenue to share what she’s learned through an unexpected event, a pivotal circumstance that provided her with a new vantage point. If she could go back in time and change what happened, she would. Because she cant, she’s using it. The gift of experience is grace for tomorrow.

No experience, however trivial or traumatic, is ever wasted. Never think for one second that your trauma did not matter or matters only to you. While your experience is personal, the emotion surrounding it is universal.

Even if you haven’t suffered exactly like Courtney, you too have a pain point, a sensitive place resulting from something that someone said to you or did to you. While these derailments often masquerade as distractions, they may actually provide you with uncompromisable direction.

DISCOVERING YOUR PURPOSE

1. Is your heart breaking over a shattered dream?

2. What are you unable to see right now?

3. Can you imagine the view from a new vantage point?

4. Who do you see that needs your guidance?

5. What are the things that encourage your heart to keep beating?

If not you, then who is better equipped to help others see a way to overcome their own disappointments?

Remember, your vantage is your advantage!

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Do You Like Me?

Four powerful little words.

Do

you

like

me?

Isn’t it strange that even when I meet new people as a 45 year-old, those are the words still running through my head?

My happiness depends on the answer.

But I am not alone.

On some level, this is the question that haunts all of us. I internalized it very early. And so did you.

On the playground, at school, with your first crush.

I have four kids, one in college, two in high school, and one who just started middle school this year. (Poor baby).

I definitely don’t want their happiness to depend on whether or not they are liked. I like them. Heck, I even LOVE them. Shouldn’t that be enough?

And if I’m being honest, happiness has never been on my list of TOP FIVE goals for my kids.

The Happiness Hypothesis is the 2006 book written by Jonathan Haidt. In it, the author outlines three different ways to achieve happiness, all based on the presupposition that we flourish when we are connected.

So here’s the three kinds of connections:

1. Between Yourself & Others (Do you like me?)

2. Between Yourself & Your Work (Do I like what I do?)

3. Between Yourself & Something Larger than You (Does my life matter?)

If there’s a disconnect in any one of these three areas, happiness turns to disappointment, which often festers into resentment. Even though you are the only one who has lived your life, you can stifle your own potential for expression, connection, meaning and joy when you allow other people’s limitations to be transferred to you, something that kids do exceptionally well because they care so much about what people think about them.

She doesn’t like me because I like books and say weird stuff sometimes? Okay, then, I’ll just keep my mouth shut and pretend I don’t even like books.

I’m not smart. School is hard. I’ll make a scene and get in trouble, so I don’t have to stay in this classroom (where nobody likes me anyway)

It’s all about me, me, me. And I’ll cry if I want to!

Did you know the happiest people are those who do the most for others? Booker T. Washington said that, but a lot of other people like Mother Teresa and Martin Luther King Jr. had similar views. The causes we champion play a big part in our happiness.

I agree with Haidt; I love the idea of connection. Connection is important to healthy relationships, not to mention the reproduction and long-term survivability of every species on the planet.

But if we just want our kids to be happy, we deprive them of the opportunity to experience the good things that come from disappointment: acceptance of the things we cannot change, a commitment to make life better for ourselves and other people, and the compassion that can only be derived from lived experience.

Weird and quirky kids who have unusual hobbies find themselves marginalized. Ironically, these kids grow up to be the most interesting adults! Consider Reese Witherspoon, that icon of fashion and hospitality. An overachiever to the nth degree, she is a self-described “nerd.” So is Natalie Portman. She skipped the premiere of her own movie (Star Wars, no less!) to study for high school finals. And Rashida Jones (of The Office and Parks and Recreation fame) told a reporter she would read books in bed with a flashlight until late into the night as a kid (Me too, Rashida! Me too!). Total nerdom.

Whether you’re starting a business, opening a restaurant, or launching a product, the one thing central to success is an original idea, which acts like a magnet, drawing us to what’s interesting and unique with the promise of something better.

Telling a twelve year old to be original is like telling a terrier not to pee on a fire hydrant. “I don’t wanna be original; I just want to be like everybody else!” she will cry. (She does want to be original, she just doesn’t know it yet. “Do you like me?” mentality is winning. In service to that small voice in her head, she will squelch creativity, she will fight originality, she will shush the voice that dares her to be different.)

I wish I could go back and tell my twelve year-old self that the things that made me feel different were the things that would ultimately lead me to my passion and purpose. I wish I could have told the twelve year-old me that twelve year-old opinions don’t have the weight I assigned to them at the time. I’ve been carrying them with me all these years, only to discover when I brought them out in the open, they vaporized right before my eyes. At twelve, I was unhappy. I felt like nobody liked me. I didn’t even like myself. I don’t want my kids to feel that way.

Happiness is not our goal; wholeness is.

1. Be honest with yourself about who you are.

2. Own what’s unique about you; champion what’s unique In other people.

3. Disappointment is not a catastrophe; it’s a catalyst for compassion.

4. If someone else says something unkind, give yourself (and them) grace for the moment. The motivation is almost always related to that “Do you like me?” question.

5. Make sure the voice inside your head is the one that says, “You are fearfully and wonderfully made.” Psalms 139:14

Want more good stuff?

And just because I couldn’t resist, I’m posting a link to this Sesame Street song from Bert and Ernie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkivmh-24EY

In Defense of Ordinary

The Dream

Have you ever had a dream that felt so real you woke up and felt like you had to write it down, immediately? Have you ever had a visceral reaction to something that literally happened in your sleep?

I ask because that’s what happened to me last night.

I had a dream that I was talking to my therapist. This was weird because I don’t even have a therapist but I have been listening to Lori Gottleib’s book, Maybe You Should Talk to Someone on Audible. In the dream, I guess I was meeting with her.

She began our session with that old standby: “So what brings you here today?”

And I said, “I’m not really sure. My husband made the appointment.”

This part was a direct replay of a conversation Gavin and I had had earlier that night. Gavin has been listening to the book, too, and I think he thinks I need to go to therapy. Teasing me, he said if I made the appointment I’d probably act like I didn’t know why I was there. I guess that means I most definitely do need to go to therapy.

True story.

So then she (the therapist) switched gears and said, “Tell me about yourself.”

And so I launched into this story about my life that began with college, with choosing biology over literature (because I thought it would be more challenging), applying to medical school, getting rejected, and then getting waitlisted, and finally receiving that long-awaited acceptance letter only to decide that motherhood was the path I needed to take (because challenging or not, the truth was I didn’t really want to go to medical school). I talked about spending the next two decades wondering about my destiny, if my choices were the right ones, and if I would ever truly find my way. My words were laced with disappointment.

And even in the dream I was disappointed in myself for verbalizing the disappointment to a complete stranger.

“Only boring people get bored,” is a phrase I love to tell my kids, but secretly I’ve always felt like I was the boring one. All the striving, the countless hours I spent trying to prove that the work I was doing mattered—and for what? So I could do something that other people found interesting? That other people would appreciate? That other people would validate?

If I was waiting for someone else to give me the credit I thought I deserved, I was going to be waiting a lifetime.

An Ordinary Day

But just before I woke up, I remembered watching these old home videos. And the ones I liked the best weren’t the ones with the awards ceremonies or the birthday celebrations or the recitals. They were the everyday ones, with the house a mess and the kids too and everybody just being themselves on an ordinary day.

There was this one video where I was feeding our new baby her first bites of solid food and in walks my four-year-old. He opens the fridge, searching for a snack. “Would you like some cheese?” I ask as I shovel another spoonful of cereal into the baby’s mouth. And then his little friend ambles into the frame. And there they are—just two friends hanging out after preschool on a Tuesday. It was so beautiful and ordinary. In the video, Gavin hands them a juice box, and they slurp it up and walk away. I dip the spoon into the cereal again.

In another, my daughter is at a dress rehearsal for her spring dance recital. She’s watching the girl in front of her, and so she’s a half-step behind through the entire dance, and I am laughing because we’ve joked about this often over the years. Dancing was never her thing. She’s an artist, an observer. Watching is what she does best. She paints; she doesn’t dance.

My other son is making faces at the dinner table. He’s usually so serious, but today he is being silly. He never smiles for the camera, but here he is—hamming it up as if he’ll finally annoy us so much we’ll have no choice but to turn the camera away from him. Instead, we keep rolling. He’s missing his front teeth, and he’s adorable.

There’s one of my baby girl, lying on a rug in the bathroom while water fills the tub. She is laughing and kicking her legs, and I remember with fondness how much she loved those evening baths. On extra fussy days, I’d just run the bathwater, swaddle her up, and rock her for hours on end.

They say the little things are really the big things, but those words never felt true for me. I could never understand why I felt behind, left out, out of touch, and dumb. While other people were getting promoted and meeting interesting people, I was home raising my kids. In my heart, I knew I was doing important work, but lacking the recognition, the narrative became one of martyrdom rather than maturation.

The home movies reminded me that motherhood was the part of adulthood I liked best.

And when I watched the videos, I found myself searching for the things that were just out of focus—those nuances I might have missed if I was zooming in on the subject only.

In an article by the American Psychological Association, painting teacher and landscape artist David Dunlop tells students “to stop identifying objects and instead see scenes as collections of lines, shadows, shapes and contours.” He says that by doing this, the artists’s sketches become more three-dimensional and complete.

In the dream, I felt like my pretend therapist was saying, “All along you’ve had exactly what you always wanted. And you almost missed it.”

Except she didn’t say that. Not those words. And not out loud.

Instead, all by myself, I realized that failing to notice the lines, shadows, shapes, and contours of my own life, I had internalized an incomplete picture of my reality. Eventually, it took on a shape I didn’t even recognize.

An Extraordinary Life

I woke up, but my eyes remained closed. I let that truth wash over me. I had spent the last twenty years stepping over the ordinary as if they were legos scattered across my living room floor. Instead of picking up the pieces, I walked around what was right in front of me. Miraculously, the house still got built, the kids got raised, and the marriage survived. We built the life we wanted, not because of anything I did, but in spite of it.

And for that I am grateful. As I sit here on the couch right now writing this blog post, the dog sleeps curled on a pillow by my hip. My two younger kids are playing a computer game together. My son helps my daughter study for a science test. They are friends, and they love each other. Why in the world would I wish for more when everything I could ever want sits right next to me?

Even ordinary days hold extraordinary magic.

Ready to take it to the next level?

Wednesday WINSday--TAKE THE FIRST STEP

Some people say the first step is the hardest because it’s the scariest.

Some people say the middle steps are the hardest because they can be the most challenging.

And some people say getting to the end is the hardest because the end is never really the end. By the time we get there, things have changed so much, it’s time to start again.

For over a year, I’ve been recording Mission Driven Monday, a weekly video-cast series. I interview women I admire, and we chat about our proudest accomplishments, the things we’re learning in our current season, and the legacy we want to leave. It’s been a lot of fun, but one thing I’ve learned is that people have short attention spans, so I’m trimming the fat and spending the next 52 weeks sharing the best little nuggets from every conversation.

Meet Amy Phelps!

My friend, Amy, was my first interview subject. She’s a mother and a wife, a former teacher, and a current autodidact.

Don’t know know what an autodidact is? If I was a teacher, I’d tell you to look it up so you would remember it better. You probably should look it up anyway because an autodidact is a self-learner.

I met Amy in the way that all young moms do—in the preschool carpool line. All the minutes we spent together at birthday parties, mother/daughter teas, and school programs, added together to create a beautiful friendship.

I say this a lot, but none of us are JUST moms. We make PB&Js AND we make art. We give baths AND we give time to causes that matter. We do homework AND we do both paid and unpaid “job-type” work.

All these responsibilities can leave us feeling both full and empty at the same time. Our kids don’t need us less as they get older, but they do need us in different ways. Nothing stays the same, and so we must do the very thing we tell our kids to do—adapt to change.

Amy, a former Biology teacher, is learning how to do photography and web design, a strong departure from her former world of plant physiology and animal dissection.

She says, “All you have to do is start. And then you realize you’re not alone.”

There’s this song I love from the 1960s, a turbulent time in the United States for sure, but I also think it fits here.

These lyrics of “The Times They Are A Changin’” are as relevant today as they were more than fifty years ago.

“Come mothers and fathers
Throughout the land
And don’t criticize
What you can’t understand
Your sons and your daughters
Are beyond your command
Your old road is rapidly agin’
Please get out of the new one
If you can’t lend your hand
For the times they are a-changin’”

— Bob Dylan

It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that getting anywhere in life requires taking a step. I need to be reminded that while taking steps is good, the payoff isn’t always at the end. Who we meet along the way is usually the best part of every adventure.

My friend Amy knows that. College ends, and life with family begins, children grow up, and the things that worked for us in the past may no longer be the things that sustain us as welcome the future.

I’m grateful for our friendship. And it wouldn’t have happened if we both hadn’t taken steps toward each other nearly a decade ago. As our paths crossed, so did our work.

If you want to see our full interview, you can watch it here.

Want more GOOD STUFF?

I wrote this FREE GUIDE, and it’s just for Mission Driven Women. Fun fact: Amy did all the design and layout! You can get it free here:

Take the first step

You don’t have to know what you want to be because there’s so much joy in discovering WHO YOU WANT TO BE.

All you have to do is start.

And then you realize you’re not alone.

WHO ARE THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE BEEN INSTRUMENTAL IN HELPING YOU BECOME THE PERSON YOU WANT TO BE?

Mission Driven Monday--Orly Wahba

Meet Orly Wahba!

Orly might just be the most interesting woman in the world. I’m not kidding! When you read her bio, your jaw will drop. This woman is a mover and a shaker! She was first introduced to me by my friend, Lydia Mays, founder of See Beautiful.

I had the distinct privilege of being one of the first to read Orly’s book, Kindness Boomerang. It’s beautiful and deceptively simple, not because it’s lacking in any way but because Orly envisions a world where kindness isn’t the exception but rather the EXPECTATION.

Orly Wahba is an educator, entrepreneur, motivational speaker, author and community activist, passionate about inspiring and motivating people to make the world a kinder place. Orly began her career in kindness as a middle school educator at the Yeshivah of Flatbush in Brooklyn, New York, teaching the children to embrace unity, build their self-esteem, and use the power they have to influence the world for good.

Yearning to make a larger impact with her philanthropic work, Orly founded Life Vest Inside——a non-profit organization with a mission to empower and unite the world with kindness——in 2011. Through Life Vest Inside, Orly encourages people to embrace the incredible power of giving and recognize that in times of hardship, kindness——like a life vest——keeps the world afloat.

Life Vest Inside gained international acclaim when Orly’s award-winning film Kindness Boomerang went viral, receiving over 30 million views, landing her a spot at TED2013, where she presented a talk on the magic of kindness. Orly and her work have been featured on The Today Show, CBS, NBC, Bloomberg TV among others.

Orly's first book Kindness Boomerang: How to Save the World (and Yourself) Through 365 Daily Acts was released in January 2017 and serves as a lesson-a-day guide to living a kinder, happier life. Her cross country Kindness Boomerang tour was a huge success, delivering over 50 talks in a 5 week period. The mission: to spread kindness & foster positive dialogue. Orly created and runs Dance for Kindness, an annual global event uniting people in over 50 countries, 120 cities under the banner of kindness.

“We are all unique, significant and special in our own way——each of us with something to contribute to this wonderful world that only we can give.”

— Orly Wahba



In 2014, the seeds for a new venture were planted and in the summer of 2019 finally became a reality called - Abraham's Legacy: A Social Network for Prayer launched on both iTunes and Google Play. Orly created the app in memory of her grandfather and hero, Albert Nackab Z’L

Orly attended Trapeze School NYC, directed community theater, plays drums and piano, figure skates, plays basketball, softball and is a mean ping pong player. She also has hopes and dreams of infusing positive change in the political arena by focusing on ethics, character and values.

Orly serves on the Board of the Pay it Forward Foundation and the Brooklyn College Foundation. Orly received her BA in Film Production and English from Brooklyn College, and her MA in Jewish History from Touro College.

Orly is following her mission, not the madness. I’m excited for you to join us for this conversation.

Important Links from this Episode:

Orly’s 2013 Ted Talk: Kindness Matters

Kindness Boomerang: How to Save the World (and Yourself) through 365 Daily Acts

Dance for Kindness: Worldwide Flashmob on Sunday, November 10th, 2019

Abraham’s Legacy: A Social Network for Prayer

Want more great content?

A Simple Exercise to Discover Your Purpose

By Guest Contributor, Kristi Porter, Founder and Chief Do-Gooder at Signify.

“I first met Kristi about three years ago. At the time, I was just beginning my own journey into entrepreneurship, and the learning curve was steep. I felt like I had no idea what I was doing! Someone sent me the link to Signify’s website and blog and there I found a guide who seemed to know exactly how I was feeling and exactly what I needed in order to lead my growing business with confidence. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, unequipped, or just plain stuck, then I encourage you to check out both the free resources and paid offerings at Signify. You won’t regret it!”

I

And now, here’s Kristi:

I’m sure this has never happened to you, but there are times in my life when I’ve felt aimless.
Directionless.
Purposeless.

 It’s not a good feeling. In fact, it’s a pretty discouraging feeling.

 Ever been there?

 At times like this, one of the best exercises I’ve found to get back on track is one I discovered in the Experiencing God workbook. Three times I’ve done this Bible study, and three times it’s changed my life.

I’ll give you the 50-cent tour of this exercise below, but what I think it does so well is give me perspective. Perspective brings clarity, both for where God has brought me, and potentially where He is leading me.

When we’re feeling sad, restless, or like we have no vision for the future, I think it’s often because we’re caught up in our own stuff. It’s like not being able to see the forest for the trees.

However, when we have perspective, we can rise out of our own circumstances to see the path we’ve been on and, possibly, the direction we’re headed—even if it’s only the next step.

Share Your Story to Gain Perspective

I’ll give you a small example from my own life to illustrate. I’m a solopreneur, so I have no co-workers. If you’ve ever tried to do something big on your own, you know there are lots of moments of doubt. I go through those pretty much daily! Plus, because I have no one working alongside me, there’s no one to constantly talk me down off the metaphorical ledge.

It’s at these times God has been so faithful. Without a doubt, He sends me someone new, and I get to tell my story. It could be in a new client meeting, someone I met at an event, or just a new friend. Regardless, they don’t where I’ve been, so I get to tell them.

In the process of sharing my story, I listen. And by the time I arrive at the present, I think to myself, “Wow!

That’s MY story! I got to live that, and now I get to serve the people and causes I care about. That’s amazing!”

Just like the exercise below, sharing our stories gives us perspective. It’s not about our busy calendars; it’s about the journey. And I think it’s that kind of outlook that truly gives us vision.

So, if you’re feeling restless, burned out, or looking for deeper insight in your life, give this exercise from the Experiencing God workbook a try. It can be an incredible opportunity for breakthrough, especially when trying to discern those things that bring meaning to your life, and maybe even your purpose.

Take an Objective Look at Your Past

The first step is to figure out where you’ve been. Getting perspective can be incredibly difficult in the day-to-day. There’s so much being thrown at us all the time to keep us busy and distracted. This could be a source of great unrest for a lot of us, because we feel like we’re just moving through life on autopilot. And autopilot is the opposite of what we’re after—purpose.

So, to move forward, we’ll start by looking backward.

Essentially, what you’ll need to do is list your “sign posts,” as the study calls them. These could be major milestones as well as meaningful moments. Think about the points in your life that stand out.

Oh, and before you begin to “put pen to paper,” also think about how you personally like to process information.

Me? I love bullet points, so I keep a list of these sign posts in Evernote. I’m a list maker at heart, and I don’t like keeping up with paper.

But if you’re a more artsy type of person, maybe you want to take a big piece of paper and create a map or draw your sign posts visually.

Find a way to help you get the information out of your head so that you can analyze it later.

 Okay, back to it! Here are a few prompts to get you started:

·      What are the major milestones that have occurred in your life? (ex: moves, college, marriage, kids, jobs)

·      What moments have been meaningful? (ex: pivotal conversations, experiences)

·      When/where/why have you grown spiritually? (ex: What did this look like?)

·      What other times stand out in your life?

Having done this study three times, I started with the big transitions and then began to fill in the gaps. Now, I add to it annually with anything I think adds a dot to my personal timeline.

The important thing here is write down anything that stands out to you, and that you consider to have shaped you in some way. 

Look for Common Threads

Whew—that’s a lot, right? Some good stuff and some not so good stuff? Me, too.

There are definitely days I’d rather forget about heartaches, bad bosses, and having chronic health issues, but those experiences shaped me, too.

So, after you’ve written what amounts to the abridged story of your life out of your head, move on to the evaluation. Basically, connect the dots of your life.

Look for common themes, threads, and occurrences.

What continues to pop up?
What trends do you see?
What makes you happy?
What makes you sad?
What do you want to see more of?

If you’re having trouble spotting themes, ask someone you trust to take a look. They might be able to spot them more quickly.

Next, add your own summary section so you have a dedicated place for your takeaways. You’ll want these to stand out for future reference.

Move Forward with More Clarity

Hopefully, you’re starting to see more clearly. You’re able to identify lessons, ideas, and values you couldn’t see as easily before.

Maybe it reinforced your thinking, or maybe it surprised you. Regardless, I hope and pray God has revealed Himself to you.

 Here are just a few of my own insights:

·      Justice has looked different to me over the years, but it’s always been important to me. I volunteered for years with social justice organizations, but I realized that I needed it to be a bigger part of my life. So, while I love working with all my clients, my favorites are definitely in the social impact space.

·      Writing has been a big part of my life since I was a kid. Even when I wasn’t doing it full-time, I had to start a blog to not only keep up with the practice of writing, but feed this source of creativity.

·      Traveling brings me both enjoyment and clarity. Over the last couple of years, I’ve made it a point to figure out ways to travel, even short distances every couple of months. It’s not just for fun, but to use as periods of reflection for my business.

·      It’s not uncommon for me to have major spiritual breakthroughs after moving to a new location. I think one of the reasons I’ve felt spiritually stagnant recently is because I’ve been in the same place for too long!

 And remember, new experiences can change your perspective. I think it’s a good idea to do this exercise each year to see what new insights appear and where God might be leading you next. Your purpose might indeed look the same throughout your life, or may shift from season to season or year-to-year.

What about you? What has been revealed to you through this process? With all of this newfound knowledge, what will you do next?

 Whether you found a new direction or purpose or not, you should see that there is order to the chaos we call life. You have been created and called, loved and led, gifted and given, restored and redeemed—over and over again. You have not been forgotten, you have been favored.

 Kristi Porter helps nonprofits and for-profits with a social mission get noticed and grow through effective marketing and communications. She also teaches solopreneurs and small businesses how to incorporate easy philanthropy strategies. Essentially, Kristi makes cause-focused organizations look and sound more professional so they can build a larger audience, increase sales or donations, and do more good. Connect with Kristi here.

Kristi Porter, Founder and Executive Director of Signify. Focus and Shine!

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If you missed our interview with Kristi Porter for Mission Driven Monday, you can catch up HERE.

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Ready to take it to the next level?